I'm a guy. And to be honest, I'm proud to be a guy. And sometimes, I feel like this society tries to make guys apologize for being guys, which I think is ridiculous. And apologizing is something I will NEVER do for that reason. I don't owe ANYONE an apology because I'm a guy. I think this society is not willing to allow guys to be masculine, so it tries to tame masculinity. Make guys more emotional. Make them nicer. Preach manners to them. But no one is paying a higher price for taming masculinity than society as a whole. Our schools are suffering. Our government is suffering. And most of all, our families are suffering. Why? Because when we need men to step up during times of difficulty, we find that men don't know how to step up. All they know how to be is nice because that's all they're told to be. And I'm sorry, but niceness is overrated and it just doesn't cut it. And as far as I'm concerned, I'm through with being nice. I'm not saying that I don't believe in having compassion or sharing your emotions, but there's something wrong when that's the only things that guys know how to do. Society has stripped masculinity of what it was meant to be.
I want to be the guy who has no problem being competitive regardless of the reaction people may have. I want to be able to do what my heart is telling me to do and not feel like I have to apologize for it. I want to say what's on my heart and on my mind without worrying how people may feel. I want to have the courage to make a scene when I feel like it is necessary. I want to pursue my dreams without putting too much stock in the potential risks or dangers. I want to hold the notions of "being good" and "being true" higher than the notion of "being nice".
1 Corinthians 9:24 Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.
Monday, May 10, 2010
Thursday, May 6, 2010
The Myth of "Open-mindedness"
We live in a society that glorifies individuals who claim to be "open-minded". And to be brutally honest, I believe it to be a bunch of crap. I have two reasons for that: one, I don't believe anyone has ever been truly "open-minded" and two, I don't believe we ever should be. Let me elaborate on these two points.
I think that every person is a lot closer to being narrow-minded than anything else. Now, before you start to point your finger and scream "blasphemy!" or shout "not I!", let me ask you a number of questions. Have you ever: developed a personality, bought a car, bought a house, hung out with a friend, walked into a store, listened to music, watched a television show, gone to a sporting event, flown on a plane, applied for a job, ordered a meal at a restaurant, worn clothes, had a girlfriend/boyfriend? etc. etc. etc. I could have easily typed for the rest of my life, but I'll leave the list as it is because I think you'll get the picture. If you answered yes to ANY one of those questions, guess what?!?! You're narrow-minded! The reason why is because you made a definitive choice. If anything has a definition or boundary, it is not open, but narrow. And when you make a choice, you exclude everything but the thing you chose. So, logically, to be truly "open-minded", you would have to continually avoid ever making a single choice or creating an opinion. Even if the only choice you made was to be "open-minded", you would then begin the process of deviating away from exactly what you claimed to be! It would be the equivalent of stating "the only choice I will ever make is to never make a choice!" It would be a meaningless statement!
Now, I know some of you are already thinking "of course I'm not open-minded in day to day life situations, but of spiritual matters". But I believe the same case could be made of spiritual matters, or anything that is in the realm of ethics, morality, and religion. Let me ask you a number of questions. Do you believe: love to be a good virtue, religion to be worthless, violence to be unnecessary, truth to be subjective, there isn't a God, there is a God, etc. etc. etc. Again, I could have spent the rest of my life typing out that list. If you answered yes to ANY of those questions, then you're officially narrow-minded in spiritual matters! Again, I would say that any time you form an opinion or belief on anything in life, you exclude everything else, making your belief or opinion narrow.
Let me elaborate on the difference on being "open-minded" (which I believe to be an impossible ideal to live by) and being open to changing your mind. You may say that being open to changing your mind is the same thing as being "open-minded", but I would argue that there is a distinct difference between the two. One stance is purely based on pure passivity ("open-mindedness") and one is based on an aggressive stance (if that may be the right word to describe it!) In one situation, you have no formed beliefs or opinions on anything and in the other, you already have formed beliefs or opinions. I believe that we all should be open to changing our minds on things, but only on one condition: when one of our beliefs or opinions can be proved false or incompatible with the way we see the world. Let's say that you grew up thinking that every surfer had long hair. You would see every surfer in the magazines with long hair and you believed it to be the rule. But then, you go to the beach and see a dude surfing and he is bald. Your old belief was no longer compatible with the way you saw the world, so therefore you change your belief on that matter. You should never change your belief just to change it. There should be a reason for doing so!
I obviously could write forever on this subject, but I will keep this entry as simple as I can keep it. I want to finish by saying that when we argue with each other and reject others' opinions or beliefs just because we seem them as being "narrow-minded", we should remember that every one of us is equally narrow-minded as everyone else. The debate should never be about whether or not our views or someone else's views are open or narrow, but whether or not they are shown to be true. Of course, that's an entirely different subject though!
I think that every person is a lot closer to being narrow-minded than anything else. Now, before you start to point your finger and scream "blasphemy!" or shout "not I!", let me ask you a number of questions. Have you ever: developed a personality, bought a car, bought a house, hung out with a friend, walked into a store, listened to music, watched a television show, gone to a sporting event, flown on a plane, applied for a job, ordered a meal at a restaurant, worn clothes, had a girlfriend/boyfriend? etc. etc. etc. I could have easily typed for the rest of my life, but I'll leave the list as it is because I think you'll get the picture. If you answered yes to ANY one of those questions, guess what?!?! You're narrow-minded! The reason why is because you made a definitive choice. If anything has a definition or boundary, it is not open, but narrow. And when you make a choice, you exclude everything but the thing you chose. So, logically, to be truly "open-minded", you would have to continually avoid ever making a single choice or creating an opinion. Even if the only choice you made was to be "open-minded", you would then begin the process of deviating away from exactly what you claimed to be! It would be the equivalent of stating "the only choice I will ever make is to never make a choice!" It would be a meaningless statement!
Now, I know some of you are already thinking "of course I'm not open-minded in day to day life situations, but of spiritual matters". But I believe the same case could be made of spiritual matters, or anything that is in the realm of ethics, morality, and religion. Let me ask you a number of questions. Do you believe: love to be a good virtue, religion to be worthless, violence to be unnecessary, truth to be subjective, there isn't a God, there is a God, etc. etc. etc. Again, I could have spent the rest of my life typing out that list. If you answered yes to ANY of those questions, then you're officially narrow-minded in spiritual matters! Again, I would say that any time you form an opinion or belief on anything in life, you exclude everything else, making your belief or opinion narrow.
Let me elaborate on the difference on being "open-minded" (which I believe to be an impossible ideal to live by) and being open to changing your mind. You may say that being open to changing your mind is the same thing as being "open-minded", but I would argue that there is a distinct difference between the two. One stance is purely based on pure passivity ("open-mindedness") and one is based on an aggressive stance (if that may be the right word to describe it!) In one situation, you have no formed beliefs or opinions on anything and in the other, you already have formed beliefs or opinions. I believe that we all should be open to changing our minds on things, but only on one condition: when one of our beliefs or opinions can be proved false or incompatible with the way we see the world. Let's say that you grew up thinking that every surfer had long hair. You would see every surfer in the magazines with long hair and you believed it to be the rule. But then, you go to the beach and see a dude surfing and he is bald. Your old belief was no longer compatible with the way you saw the world, so therefore you change your belief on that matter. You should never change your belief just to change it. There should be a reason for doing so!
I obviously could write forever on this subject, but I will keep this entry as simple as I can keep it. I want to finish by saying that when we argue with each other and reject others' opinions or beliefs just because we seem them as being "narrow-minded", we should remember that every one of us is equally narrow-minded as everyone else. The debate should never be about whether or not our views or someone else's views are open or narrow, but whether or not they are shown to be true. Of course, that's an entirely different subject though!
Thursday, April 15, 2010
This Journey We Call "Life"
Every once in a while, I get this overwhelming urge to somehow collect my random thoughts, put them together, and see what is created. This is one of those moments. So here goes nothing!
Not to be cliche at all, but I've always viewed life as a journey. But I'm starting to learn recently that life is a journey with no real destination At least not in this life. So many times, I've gotten caught up in trying to get to certain places in my life so that I can stop moving, stop traveling. Recently, I flew down to Phoenix to help my family move back to Portland. And to be perfectly honest, the only thing I was thinking the entire time was "I just want to get back home so that I can rest." I would get really irritated if we had to make a lot of stops along the way because that would prolong me getting to my destination. And now, looking back on that trip, I find that I pretty much wasted most of it. And the reason why I wasted most of it was because I was not living by the moment. I was not taking advantage of the opportunities to learn and to grow through that whole process. My entire focus was on trying to get to a destination.
Now, don't get me wrong, I believe that having a destination in life is important. And setting goals for yourself to accomplish is commendable. But, if you're like me, you set goals so that when you accomplish them, you can look back on it and bask in what you did. And ultimately, so you can feel like you have arrived at a place where you can just sit down and rest. So you can be comfortable. And I'm learning now that when you live life like that, you are missing out on so many opportunities to truly live.
I find myself being just really complacent with a lot of things in life these days. And the reason I got to this point was because I allowed myself to become comfortable with where I was at. Several years back, I made a goal to somehow become what I am now and I'm finding now that I was just looking forward to being able to stop and rest. I accomplished my goal and now I get to reap the benefits of being comfortable with who I am and what I'm doing. And to tell you the truth, being comfortable sucks! My passion, motivation, and excitement for life are missing. It's almost like they are pieces of a puzzle I must first locate and then put back together again. The process and the journey it took to get here was full of excitement, unpredictable circumstances, and opportunities to grow and to learn. Sure, it was a tough journey, but that's what made it so worth it! Now the important thing I'm learning about life is that when we become comfortable for too long, we stop learning. And when we stop learning, we stop moving forward. And when we stop moving forward, we stop truly living and our soul slowly starts to die inside. And I feel like that's where I'm at.
So now, I know that I must get back on my feet and start moving forward to the next thing that God has in store for me. I'm not talking about moving to a different place or quitting everything I'm involved in because I know that I'm at the place where I need to be. I'm talking about reclaiming my passion and reclaiming my soul so that I can live my life by giving God all the glory and by loving and cherishing the people around me.
I hope all of you are doing well and I encourage us all to never stop moving forward!
Not to be cliche at all, but I've always viewed life as a journey. But I'm starting to learn recently that life is a journey with no real destination At least not in this life. So many times, I've gotten caught up in trying to get to certain places in my life so that I can stop moving, stop traveling. Recently, I flew down to Phoenix to help my family move back to Portland. And to be perfectly honest, the only thing I was thinking the entire time was "I just want to get back home so that I can rest." I would get really irritated if we had to make a lot of stops along the way because that would prolong me getting to my destination. And now, looking back on that trip, I find that I pretty much wasted most of it. And the reason why I wasted most of it was because I was not living by the moment. I was not taking advantage of the opportunities to learn and to grow through that whole process. My entire focus was on trying to get to a destination.
Now, don't get me wrong, I believe that having a destination in life is important. And setting goals for yourself to accomplish is commendable. But, if you're like me, you set goals so that when you accomplish them, you can look back on it and bask in what you did. And ultimately, so you can feel like you have arrived at a place where you can just sit down and rest. So you can be comfortable. And I'm learning now that when you live life like that, you are missing out on so many opportunities to truly live.
I find myself being just really complacent with a lot of things in life these days. And the reason I got to this point was because I allowed myself to become comfortable with where I was at. Several years back, I made a goal to somehow become what I am now and I'm finding now that I was just looking forward to being able to stop and rest. I accomplished my goal and now I get to reap the benefits of being comfortable with who I am and what I'm doing. And to tell you the truth, being comfortable sucks! My passion, motivation, and excitement for life are missing. It's almost like they are pieces of a puzzle I must first locate and then put back together again. The process and the journey it took to get here was full of excitement, unpredictable circumstances, and opportunities to grow and to learn. Sure, it was a tough journey, but that's what made it so worth it! Now the important thing I'm learning about life is that when we become comfortable for too long, we stop learning. And when we stop learning, we stop moving forward. And when we stop moving forward, we stop truly living and our soul slowly starts to die inside. And I feel like that's where I'm at.
So now, I know that I must get back on my feet and start moving forward to the next thing that God has in store for me. I'm not talking about moving to a different place or quitting everything I'm involved in because I know that I'm at the place where I need to be. I'm talking about reclaiming my passion and reclaiming my soul so that I can live my life by giving God all the glory and by loving and cherishing the people around me.
I hope all of you are doing well and I encourage us all to never stop moving forward!
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Looking in the Mirror
So I was watching the movie "Reign Over Me" tonight for the first time. If you haven't seen it, I definitely recommend it. It's a movie about a guy who reaches out to a friend of his who is going through a lot of pain. His friend lost his entire family in the 9/11 attacks and let's just say he isn't handling it well. There was one scene in the movie that totally stood out to me.
So both guys are having dinner at a restaurant and the guy who's reaching out to his friend starts talking about some struggles that he's going through with his family. Then he asks his friend who has lost everything, "Are you going to be alright?" And his friend responds by saying, "I'm more worried about you."
That scene struck me so much because I see a lot of myself in that interchange. For my entire life, I've been the kind of person that is always trying to reach out to help people. And because of that, many people who have gone through difficult times have been drawn to me and I've always been more than willing to do what I can to help them out, talk to them, listen, etc. Looking back on those times, I have found that I reach out to people for two reasons: 1.) To help the person and 2.) to avoid working on my own issues. Because after all, if I'm so caught up in what another person is going through, I feel like I don't have to turn my eyes on myself and what I may need to work on. I'm not saying that I haven't really helped anyone, I'm just saying that a lot of times, I have done it for the wrong reasons.
So often, it's easier for us to look at another person in their eyes than it is to look at ourselves in the mirror. Mainly because we're afraid of what we'll see. If we honestly looked at ourselves in the mirror, we might realize that we aren't as good or as strong as we thought or hoped we were. A mirror reveals imperfections. It reveals mistakes. It reveals regrets. And if we catch a glimpse of what is really there, we turn away as fast as we can in hopes that we'll forget what we just saw. But unfortunately, we know exactly what we saw and looking away won't make us forget who we are.
The good news, and this is something that I've been learning a lot about lately, is that the image we see today in the mirror doesn't have to be the image we see tomorrow, or the next day, or the next year. Seeing our own imperfections is a painful experience but it also gives us an amazing opportunity: the opportunity to change. To renew. To transform into the person we want to be. But the choice is always ours to make. No one else can make it for us. And the first step, as always, is to take a good look in the mirror.
Romans 12:2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind
Romans 12:12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer
Hope you enjoyed this entry. Thanks for reading it!
Matt
So both guys are having dinner at a restaurant and the guy who's reaching out to his friend starts talking about some struggles that he's going through with his family. Then he asks his friend who has lost everything, "Are you going to be alright?" And his friend responds by saying, "I'm more worried about you."
That scene struck me so much because I see a lot of myself in that interchange. For my entire life, I've been the kind of person that is always trying to reach out to help people. And because of that, many people who have gone through difficult times have been drawn to me and I've always been more than willing to do what I can to help them out, talk to them, listen, etc. Looking back on those times, I have found that I reach out to people for two reasons: 1.) To help the person and 2.) to avoid working on my own issues. Because after all, if I'm so caught up in what another person is going through, I feel like I don't have to turn my eyes on myself and what I may need to work on. I'm not saying that I haven't really helped anyone, I'm just saying that a lot of times, I have done it for the wrong reasons.
So often, it's easier for us to look at another person in their eyes than it is to look at ourselves in the mirror. Mainly because we're afraid of what we'll see. If we honestly looked at ourselves in the mirror, we might realize that we aren't as good or as strong as we thought or hoped we were. A mirror reveals imperfections. It reveals mistakes. It reveals regrets. And if we catch a glimpse of what is really there, we turn away as fast as we can in hopes that we'll forget what we just saw. But unfortunately, we know exactly what we saw and looking away won't make us forget who we are.
The good news, and this is something that I've been learning a lot about lately, is that the image we see today in the mirror doesn't have to be the image we see tomorrow, or the next day, or the next year. Seeing our own imperfections is a painful experience but it also gives us an amazing opportunity: the opportunity to change. To renew. To transform into the person we want to be. But the choice is always ours to make. No one else can make it for us. And the first step, as always, is to take a good look in the mirror.
Romans 12:2 Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind
Romans 12:12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and faithful in prayer
Hope you enjoyed this entry. Thanks for reading it!
Matt
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
When all comes crashing down.....
I believe that even though my life is made up of countless moments, some moments truly define who I really am. I also believe that there's a difference, even a significant difference, between the person I believe I am and the person who is accurately reflected in the mirror when all is stripped away. Let me explain what I mean.
It doesn't take too much brutal honesty for us to realize that we all have this personal image that we would like to conform to. And it takes even more brutal honesty to admit that we're not there yet.Most of us, if we were to analyze ourselves, could think of at least 5 qualities that we would like our life to be defined by. Honesty, integrity, strength, compassion, faith, love, loyalty etc. The list goes on and on. These qualities and characteristics are incredibly important for us to pursue because it helps us grow as individuals.
The main issue in my own life stems from the fact that I tend to see myself and portray myself to others as already being that person that I am pursuing to become. Sometimes, the facade will hold for quite some time, but I find that it takes a single moment to disarm that image and leave me with a true reflection of the person I REALLY am. One of those moments happened just a couple days ago.
I was relaxing at my place after a great day of sleeping in, reading, and teaching guitar lessons. I got a message on my facebook page from a friend of mine who said that I really needed to call him. I just thought he wanted to talk sports or invite me to hang out sometime. Then I heard the words that you never want to hear from anyone. "I wish I had good news to tell you, but....." He then went on to tell me that a buddy of ours had committed suicide. My world came crashing down. And with it, the image of who I thought I was.
One characteristic that I have always pursued in my life is having a faith in God that would stay strong, even if everything around me was coming apart. After that phone call, not only did I feel overwhelming grief for the loss of a friend, but I was also filled with an incredible amount of doubt. I felt like God had failed. Like He ceased to be good, compassionate, and in control. It was alarming to me that I could have those thoughts and feelings in spite of who I thought I was.That tragedy had called my bluff.
Even though it's been only a few days since this has happened, I've been learning a lot. I'm learning that it's okay to doubt when horrible things happen. It's a natural reaction. And I'm also learning to accept the fact that I haven't "arrived" yet. I'm still on a journey to become who God wants to me to be. And I need to accept that the journey is in some ways more important than the destination.
Thanks for reading and I sincerely ask for your prayers for my friend's family and friends as they grieve the loss. God bless
It doesn't take too much brutal honesty for us to realize that we all have this personal image that we would like to conform to. And it takes even more brutal honesty to admit that we're not there yet.Most of us, if we were to analyze ourselves, could think of at least 5 qualities that we would like our life to be defined by. Honesty, integrity, strength, compassion, faith, love, loyalty etc. The list goes on and on. These qualities and characteristics are incredibly important for us to pursue because it helps us grow as individuals.
The main issue in my own life stems from the fact that I tend to see myself and portray myself to others as already being that person that I am pursuing to become. Sometimes, the facade will hold for quite some time, but I find that it takes a single moment to disarm that image and leave me with a true reflection of the person I REALLY am. One of those moments happened just a couple days ago.
I was relaxing at my place after a great day of sleeping in, reading, and teaching guitar lessons. I got a message on my facebook page from a friend of mine who said that I really needed to call him. I just thought he wanted to talk sports or invite me to hang out sometime. Then I heard the words that you never want to hear from anyone. "I wish I had good news to tell you, but....." He then went on to tell me that a buddy of ours had committed suicide. My world came crashing down. And with it, the image of who I thought I was.
One characteristic that I have always pursued in my life is having a faith in God that would stay strong, even if everything around me was coming apart. After that phone call, not only did I feel overwhelming grief for the loss of a friend, but I was also filled with an incredible amount of doubt. I felt like God had failed. Like He ceased to be good, compassionate, and in control. It was alarming to me that I could have those thoughts and feelings in spite of who I thought I was.That tragedy had called my bluff.
Even though it's been only a few days since this has happened, I've been learning a lot. I'm learning that it's okay to doubt when horrible things happen. It's a natural reaction. And I'm also learning to accept the fact that I haven't "arrived" yet. I'm still on a journey to become who God wants to me to be. And I need to accept that the journey is in some ways more important than the destination.
Thanks for reading and I sincerely ask for your prayers for my friend's family and friends as they grieve the loss. God bless
Monday, July 20, 2009
Embracing Who I Was Created to Be
As much as I hate to admit it, I am always concerned about peoples' perception of me. I try to portray this image of "I don't care what anyone thinks", but I have to be honest and say that it's a lie. I am constantly tying to earn the approval of those around me and it drives me crazy sometimes. I have to look a certain way, talk a certain way, have certain possessions, a high-paying job, etc. And if I don't fit the mold of what people see as "successful", then I feel like I'm not as valuable as I could be. And the fact that I'm a guy definitely doesn't help the situation. Most guys will agree with me on this.
A common question that gets asked of me is "what do you do?" and my goal, every time, in answering that question is to make myself sound as successful as I can. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do. But at the same time, I fear that the person I'm talking to won't approve of it or think it's a good use of my time. Almost like I have to get my every decision approved by another human being. And in my mind, I know it's stupid to think that way, but I'm still affected by it.
I think the time in my life where I struggled the most with this issue was the first few years after high school. Everyone was talking about what college they were going to, how much money they were going to make in the future with their degree, how successful they were, etc. It was almost like a game we played. And, in my case, I always found myself on the losing end. There I was, 19 years old, and not sure of what I wanted to do with my life. I wasn't going to college because I felt like it wasn't for me. So I was living at home and working as a host at a restaurant. Not exactly the image of success if you ask me. I didn't really feel valuable as a person through those years.
So, here I am at the age of 26. Most of my time is spent being a guitar instructor. I travel around to peoples' houses and teach them how to play music. And this is something that I always dreamed of doing every since I learned how to play the guitar. I always thought that if I can play music for a living, in some way, shape, or form, I'd feel like I was doing what I was created to do. And yet, sometimes, I find myself somehow wishing I was doing something different. Something more glorified in this culture. Like being a CEO of a wealthy business. Or a professional athlete. Or anything that would enable me financially to purchase the bright red corvette convertible, the nice house, and the nice yacht on the river. Something that would make any attractive, single female look my way and say, "Now there's a guy who has it going on. I should probably give him my number." But, as it stands, I'm still single and I'm not driving the corvette. And I'm tempted to feel sorry for myself. Not because my life is horrible or anything, it's actually pretty good, but because my life doesn't fit that image that is portrayed in the media.
I've found that my problem isn't necessarily what I do in life, but in who I listen to in order to define who I am. It's not about me changing everything about myself to fit an image, but knowing who God created me to be. I'm learning how to listen to God and allow him to define who He wants me to be, not everyone around me. And I'm learning to accept who I am. And not just accept who I am, but learning to embrace that. To use the gifts and abilities that God has graciously given to me and to pursue them with wreckless abandon. Because, after all, people who don't enjoy what they do in life are quite a drag to be around. So, from here on out, if you ever need to find me, I won't be the guy in the bright red convertible or on the yacht in the river, I'll be the one with a smile on my face and a guitar in my hands. Come and talk to me!
A common question that gets asked of me is "what do you do?" and my goal, every time, in answering that question is to make myself sound as successful as I can. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do. But at the same time, I fear that the person I'm talking to won't approve of it or think it's a good use of my time. Almost like I have to get my every decision approved by another human being. And in my mind, I know it's stupid to think that way, but I'm still affected by it.
I think the time in my life where I struggled the most with this issue was the first few years after high school. Everyone was talking about what college they were going to, how much money they were going to make in the future with their degree, how successful they were, etc. It was almost like a game we played. And, in my case, I always found myself on the losing end. There I was, 19 years old, and not sure of what I wanted to do with my life. I wasn't going to college because I felt like it wasn't for me. So I was living at home and working as a host at a restaurant. Not exactly the image of success if you ask me. I didn't really feel valuable as a person through those years.
So, here I am at the age of 26. Most of my time is spent being a guitar instructor. I travel around to peoples' houses and teach them how to play music. And this is something that I always dreamed of doing every since I learned how to play the guitar. I always thought that if I can play music for a living, in some way, shape, or form, I'd feel like I was doing what I was created to do. And yet, sometimes, I find myself somehow wishing I was doing something different. Something more glorified in this culture. Like being a CEO of a wealthy business. Or a professional athlete. Or anything that would enable me financially to purchase the bright red corvette convertible, the nice house, and the nice yacht on the river. Something that would make any attractive, single female look my way and say, "Now there's a guy who has it going on. I should probably give him my number." But, as it stands, I'm still single and I'm not driving the corvette. And I'm tempted to feel sorry for myself. Not because my life is horrible or anything, it's actually pretty good, but because my life doesn't fit that image that is portrayed in the media.
I've found that my problem isn't necessarily what I do in life, but in who I listen to in order to define who I am. It's not about me changing everything about myself to fit an image, but knowing who God created me to be. I'm learning how to listen to God and allow him to define who He wants me to be, not everyone around me. And I'm learning to accept who I am. And not just accept who I am, but learning to embrace that. To use the gifts and abilities that God has graciously given to me and to pursue them with wreckless abandon. Because, after all, people who don't enjoy what they do in life are quite a drag to be around. So, from here on out, if you ever need to find me, I won't be the guy in the bright red convertible or on the yacht in the river, I'll be the one with a smile on my face and a guitar in my hands. Come and talk to me!
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Parables: The Underlying Stories of Our Lives
(I must give a warning and say that this post may turn into a really long one! I hope you don't mind!)
I believe in the power of a good story. There's something about hearing someone tell a
story that always seems to grab my attention. That's why I love old people. They always seem to be full of experiences that they are dying to share with people. Even as a little kid, I remember being fascinated as I would sit down and listen to my grandfather tell stories of when he was in World War 2. Stories about him trying to go to sleep in a building over in Europe while bombs were exploding all around him in the city. Stories about my mom and her brother growing up when they were kids. Places they went. Things they saw. Lessons they learned. It's all fascinating to me!
I believe our stories and experiences are powerful because our lives mean something. And if you think about it, life isn't made up of minutes, days, or years. Life is made up of our experiences. It consists of the lessons we have learned, the struggles we have faced, and the victories we have won. Each of our lives are defined by the stories we tell. And we are always telling a story, whether we realize it or not. One day at a time. One moment at a time. And I often wonder if there is another story being told, underneath the surface of our everyday lives. Almost as if God is using our experiences to not only give us a story to tell this world, but using our lives to teach us about who He is and who He wants us to become. This thought will probably need some elaboration. I think I'll start by telling a story.......
So there I was. Sitting in a bus in the middle of a Walmart parking lot in the wonderful city of Grants Pass, Oregon. My band had played a show the previous night in Ashland and we had driven to this parking lot afterwards to spend the night before driving home the next day. I was feeling dizzy because I had an unpleasant meeting the previous night involving my hands, elbows, face, and some very unforgiving pavement. But as I was staring out the front window of our "tour bus", something instantly caught my attention. It was a homeless woman. She seemed very occupied with something that, in my opinion, was absolutely ridiculous. Using a shopping cart, she was transporting dirt from the outskirts of the parking lot to a metal trash can. Since the shopping cart had many holes in it's framework, most of the dirt ended up on the pavement by the time she got to the trash can. And, to be perfectly honest, I found this amusing, even funny. Me and the rest of my bandmates sat and watched this scene unfold for a while until it came time for us to hit the road. Feeling a little sorry for the woman and her situation, we thought we'd offer her some extra food we had left over from our breakfast/lunch we had just eaten. What happened next surprised all of us..............
As we were driving up to her in our bus, she instantly started to wave her finger and yell at us for some reason. "Do you want some donuts?", I asked, while standing near the front of the bus, door open and all. I wasn't able to finish my question. "Get out of here and don't come back!" was her reply. So I offered her the donuts again, much to no avail. "Get out of here and don't come back!" After a few more attempts, she ended up throwing an apple in the general direction of our bus! After that, we decided to give up and move on. We all couldn't help but laugh at what we just experienced as we drove off, still having some donuts that we wanted to give away to someone in need. Before pulling out onto the main road, we were able to give the donuts to a homeless man holding a cardboard sign at a four-way stop. "Thanks for not throwing apples at us!", one band member told the man as we drove away.
Needless to say, this whole experience provided much laughter the entire drive home. I know I personally didn't believe it to be anything more than one of those stories that you can't wait to tell everyone you know. Not because you believe it to be "meaningful", but because it would cause anyone to erupt into laughter for the craziness of the whole situation! A funny story, nothing more. But I was so wrong!
A few weeks later, I just had this random feeling that Jesus was trying to get my attention. And He was wanting to use that experience to teach me something about myself and my interaction with Him. And as I looked back on that moment in my mind, I didn't see a homeless woman pointlessly filling a shopping cart with dirt. I saw myself. And I didn't see a bunch of guys in a bus with some extra donuts. I saw God. The creator of the the universe. The very Reason for my existence. And I couldn't help but think about my life and who I've become. How often does God lovingly reach out to me, only to hear me say "get out of here and never come back!"? How many times does God offer his help when I'm in need, only to have me turn Him away? After all, I know He sees me for who I truly am. And I wonder what He sees when He looks at me, especially when I'm trying to live my life on my own terms. Am I just "shoveling dirt" while thinking I've got my life figured out? Looking back on my life, I can see countless times when I've been no different from that woman. It's crazy to think that I easily judged her, even laughed at her and her situation, especially when I see a lot of similarities between her and myself sometimes. Her situation is just easier to notice than mine is. But not for God. He knows me better than I know myself, and yet He loves me. And I find myself wondering if He is always trying to get my attention. To tell me that my life means something. To offer His grace and help me in my times of need. To remind me that I'm loved. Or maybe He's just wanting to tell me a story. The question must be though: am I listening? Because after all, a story is powerful, especially when it's told by God himself. No wonder Jesus used parables..................
I believe in the power of a good story. There's something about hearing someone tell a
story that always seems to grab my attention. That's why I love old people. They always seem to be full of experiences that they are dying to share with people. Even as a little kid, I remember being fascinated as I would sit down and listen to my grandfather tell stories of when he was in World War 2. Stories about him trying to go to sleep in a building over in Europe while bombs were exploding all around him in the city. Stories about my mom and her brother growing up when they were kids. Places they went. Things they saw. Lessons they learned. It's all fascinating to me!
I believe our stories and experiences are powerful because our lives mean something. And if you think about it, life isn't made up of minutes, days, or years. Life is made up of our experiences. It consists of the lessons we have learned, the struggles we have faced, and the victories we have won. Each of our lives are defined by the stories we tell. And we are always telling a story, whether we realize it or not. One day at a time. One moment at a time. And I often wonder if there is another story being told, underneath the surface of our everyday lives. Almost as if God is using our experiences to not only give us a story to tell this world, but using our lives to teach us about who He is and who He wants us to become. This thought will probably need some elaboration. I think I'll start by telling a story.......
So there I was. Sitting in a bus in the middle of a Walmart parking lot in the wonderful city of Grants Pass, Oregon. My band had played a show the previous night in Ashland and we had driven to this parking lot afterwards to spend the night before driving home the next day. I was feeling dizzy because I had an unpleasant meeting the previous night involving my hands, elbows, face, and some very unforgiving pavement. But as I was staring out the front window of our "tour bus", something instantly caught my attention. It was a homeless woman. She seemed very occupied with something that, in my opinion, was absolutely ridiculous. Using a shopping cart, she was transporting dirt from the outskirts of the parking lot to a metal trash can. Since the shopping cart had many holes in it's framework, most of the dirt ended up on the pavement by the time she got to the trash can. And, to be perfectly honest, I found this amusing, even funny. Me and the rest of my bandmates sat and watched this scene unfold for a while until it came time for us to hit the road. Feeling a little sorry for the woman and her situation, we thought we'd offer her some extra food we had left over from our breakfast/lunch we had just eaten. What happened next surprised all of us..............
As we were driving up to her in our bus, she instantly started to wave her finger and yell at us for some reason. "Do you want some donuts?", I asked, while standing near the front of the bus, door open and all. I wasn't able to finish my question. "Get out of here and don't come back!" was her reply. So I offered her the donuts again, much to no avail. "Get out of here and don't come back!" After a few more attempts, she ended up throwing an apple in the general direction of our bus! After that, we decided to give up and move on. We all couldn't help but laugh at what we just experienced as we drove off, still having some donuts that we wanted to give away to someone in need. Before pulling out onto the main road, we were able to give the donuts to a homeless man holding a cardboard sign at a four-way stop. "Thanks for not throwing apples at us!", one band member told the man as we drove away.
Needless to say, this whole experience provided much laughter the entire drive home. I know I personally didn't believe it to be anything more than one of those stories that you can't wait to tell everyone you know. Not because you believe it to be "meaningful", but because it would cause anyone to erupt into laughter for the craziness of the whole situation! A funny story, nothing more. But I was so wrong!
A few weeks later, I just had this random feeling that Jesus was trying to get my attention. And He was wanting to use that experience to teach me something about myself and my interaction with Him. And as I looked back on that moment in my mind, I didn't see a homeless woman pointlessly filling a shopping cart with dirt. I saw myself. And I didn't see a bunch of guys in a bus with some extra donuts. I saw God. The creator of the the universe. The very Reason for my existence. And I couldn't help but think about my life and who I've become. How often does God lovingly reach out to me, only to hear me say "get out of here and never come back!"? How many times does God offer his help when I'm in need, only to have me turn Him away? After all, I know He sees me for who I truly am. And I wonder what He sees when He looks at me, especially when I'm trying to live my life on my own terms. Am I just "shoveling dirt" while thinking I've got my life figured out? Looking back on my life, I can see countless times when I've been no different from that woman. It's crazy to think that I easily judged her, even laughed at her and her situation, especially when I see a lot of similarities between her and myself sometimes. Her situation is just easier to notice than mine is. But not for God. He knows me better than I know myself, and yet He loves me. And I find myself wondering if He is always trying to get my attention. To tell me that my life means something. To offer His grace and help me in my times of need. To remind me that I'm loved. Or maybe He's just wanting to tell me a story. The question must be though: am I listening? Because after all, a story is powerful, especially when it's told by God himself. No wonder Jesus used parables..................
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
